When Financial Safety, Fun Adventures, Good Sex, & Making Babies Aren’t Enough

(When the true power of relationships gets sold short…)
💜I really feel as though many men and women fail to see the miraculously beneficial potential that being in a committed relationship has to offer, not just for our personal lives but also for the rest of society.
💜Far too many people settle for relationships with someone who can provide them an arrangement that yields the typical perks that most, I would hope, have come to expect going into one: someone who can cook and clean for us, who can give us great sex, someone who can buy us gifts, who can gives us kids, who we can get the house with the picket fence with, who we can go on trips with, and  who will put up with and be patient with us when we don’t feel like improving poor habits and behavior.
💜And, that’s not to say we shouldn’t expect certain perks or build towards achieving certain goals when going into a committed relationship.  It’s those instances of love that are some of the best experiences of our human existence.  However, out of the expectations I listed, you may notice how much of that ties into hyperconsumerism, aka the way we are conditioned and groomed to spend money on things we do not need.
💜For example, when it comes to expecting gifts, it’s socially expected for a man, should he ask a woman to marry him, for him to buy a $2,000 ring because that is just the way things are.  His love is not enough of a gift. There has to be an expensive piece of jewelry involved to “seal the deal.”
💜On Valentine’s Day, if you don’t receive a gift, it simply has to mean that you’re neglected, you’re not valued, and that you’re not worthy of love. People have been to have their feelings hurt if they don’t receive a gift on a particular day of the year (using fear or emotional pain to coax people into spending money).
💜When it comes to getting the house with the picket fence, you have to play the credit and mortgage game, which they really don’t prepare you for in our educational system, but expect you to learn and perform perfectly throughout your adulthood.

💜The purpose of romantic relationships is not to be used as a catalyst for propagating the ultimately unattainable goal of achieving The American Dream.
💜God created men and women to compliment each other’s very beings, physically, emotionally, and spiritually
💜The full being benefit, which so many fail to experience in a relationship, is that two are literally going into a bond in which they become one unit–a unit designed to compliment each other’s, dreams, aspirations, emotions, personalities, and physical bodies.
💜Anyone can choose to be in a relationship with someone who has a decent job, can make them laugh, and who isn’t sleeping with anyone else. However, someone who desires a genuine, love-filled relationship will push their partner to soul-search what their true purpose in this world is and push them to fulfill that.
💜The moral foundation laid by a man and a woman, in a committed relationship, is far more important to society than the financial foundation that they lay together.  How a couple manages their finances is still VERY VERY important to the success of their community, in more ways than one.  Let’s not undermine that, but, in a moral sense, we also have to look at what will be the moral character of the kind of family a couple will raise and, then, send out into the world to contribute to society–and if they will contribute negatively or positively.    
💜When does anyone go into relationship asking, “How much of a positive difference can we make together,” instead of asking, “What kind of convenient arrangement can this person give me?”  Who goes into a relationship wanting to build a better community together, not just a household?
💜Instead of going into relationship with the expectation of good sex, how about we go into one with the expectation of benefiting the physical health  of our partner, by eating right together, exercising together, and desiring to learn all the aspects of someone’s sensuality–learning about those aspects in order more accurately please them and give them the most fulfilling, stress-killing, soulful, bond-building, and nourishing experience possible?
💜Instead just wanting to make babies, a couple should ask themselves if they’ve built the ideal environment that would foster their child’s exploration and the success in their journey in finding what purpose God has for them in this world, not the purpose that the parents think the child should have.
💜It’s time to really start questioning the relationships we choose to participate in more intensely.  It’s time to start asking ourselves, “Is this person following some preset script that society has deemed “a normal relationship” to be, or are they striving to compliment my very being?” Are you seeking to complement theirs?
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All Entries, Strictly for Lovers, The Work Required for Relationships

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